Today, the 19th of September, finds our proud site in a state of desolation. With the Chief Daily Noter still unaccountably absent — detained, as rumor has it, at some maison mal famée in the heart of Gaul — the Notes have fallen into the calloused barbarian hands of the Notgraphs staff. Like coarse-bearded Vandals they mutter and slouch amid the moldering ruins: the alabaster colonnades of Cistulli’s sortable tables, now cracked and leaning; the exquisite mosaics of his NERD scores, now reduced to a many-hued rubble; the pearlescent gleam of his Corey Kluber metaphors, strewn about like offal and soiled by brutish feet. By sundown tomorrow even these — along with what little else remains of Western civilization — will have been mangled beyond recognition, and the heathens will run orgiastic riot over what once was a temple of sober reason.

Actually now there is an editor informing me that Cistulli will be back on Monday, and that you all, being no-nonsense, numbers-driven sorts of people, would really prefer that I just shut my cake hole, and so without further ado I give you the

Table of Contents

1. Body-Switching Maniacs in Miami! Or, One Possible Reason to Continue Watching the Marlins
2. Today’s MLB.TV Free Game
3. Today’s Complete Schedule

Body-Switching Maniacs in Miami! Or, One Possible Reason to Continue Watching the Marlins

Scanning today’s National League schedule in your usual desultory manner, you might find it wanting in intrigue. You would be wrong. It has intrigue in spades, most of it located in the city of Washington, and most of it due to the fact that the man impersonating Henderson Alvarez is on the verge of being unmasked.

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