Jeff Sullivan FanGraphs Chat – 9/25/12

Jeff made Lookout Landing a thing, but he does not still write there about the Mariners. He does write here, sometimes about the Mariners, but usually not.

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I’m sort of new to this sabermetric stuff, so here’s my question. Let’s say you’re at the Asian WBC qualifying games in Toyko and a tsunami sweeps you out to sea. You wake up in the Atlantic in a life raft with Mike Scosia, Bobby Valentine, and Mitt Romney. Now before you say ‘That could never h . . . I would put the probability of this event in the neighborhood of Justin Smoak hitting 4 homeruns in a major league baseball game or Jesus Montero being late for work due to pyroclastic mudflows. Anyway, while your three amigos remain unawake, you seek out the supplies box. In it, you find sufficient food and water for 2 people to last a week and a pistol with two bullets. My question: If I type the tired punchline that accompanies with this ancient joke AND manage to finish my lunch before the FBI breaks down my door, will that have a positive impact on my wOBA?