FanGraphs Opening Day 2020 Chat

7:02	Dan Szymborski: Chats. A time for chats.

7:02	Dan Szymborski: THERE IS AN ACTUAL BASEBALL GAME

7:02	Dan Szymborski: I think. Today’s Thursday, right?

7:03	Guest: Or Mr. Belvedere

7:03	Guest: Dan! How about the baseball tonight theme on SoundCloud in honor of the return of the season?

7:03	Dan Szymborski: No, we can’t weird up the Real Chats too much.

7:03	Dan Szymborski: Save that for SzymChat.

7:03	This is lude-i-cris: Hoping for many quadrangulars! Logic says it’s not in the likely range of outcomes.

7:03	Not Chet: MORE BASENALL

7:04	Dodger Fan: Not that lineup order really matters much, but the top 4 of the Dodgers’ order tonight makes very little sense

7:04	Chet: MORE BASEBALL!

7:04	Dodger Fan: No question, but it’s getting harder and harder to like Kershaw

7:04	Not Bork: Hello, friends!

7:04	Guest: Are there any more last minute announcements from MLB we should know about? Will 1 of every 10 balls now randomly be a tennis ball? Are the rules of Futurama’s blernsball now binding on MLB play? How many multi balls have to be caught for an out

7:04	Dodger Fan: Thoughts on the proposed postseason format?

7:04	Dan Szymborski: 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

7:04	Gunther Centralperk: Kershaw out with back stiffness. This is some kind of cruel joke. I’m absolutely sick over this.

7:04	Wireless Joe Jackson: PSA: Tmobile subscribers get free MLB TV and a free subscription to The Athletic redeemable through August 4

7:04	Dodger Fan: Will this chat be more like Twitter or NPR?

7:05	Dan Szymborski: With me around, more like Animal House

7:05	Lorenzo: Here’s hoping Soto had a false positive and will test negative twice by next week.

7:05	Tony Wolfe: I’m not as down on the new postseason format as many seem to be, but I certainly understand the skepticism over it

7:05	Dan Szymborski:

7:05	Tony Wolfe: I wouldn’t want it installed permanently, but for just a 2020 thing? Whatever

7:05	Appa Yip Yip: I genuinely believe that Bo Bichette is just walking around the clubhouse whispering “Road Warriors” into everyone’s ears and he is Convincing Them.

7:06	Estevao: When AJ Prefer took over the Padres was he pushed to go all in from the get go by ownership. He seems like a smart GM but some of the moves like trading Grandal for Kemp were beyond any reasoning? He is the GM that intrigues me the most

7:06	Dan Szymborski: Methink I detect the scent of an owner

7:06	Ari P: What teams are the biggest winners and losers from playoffs expanding? I would think the mets/nats are big winners, but not sure who else

7:07	Dan Szymborski: the second/third tier contenders fare best

7:07	Estevao: Were there any considerations of going with a Dome Stadium before building Coors Field? What would you think of that

7:07	Dan Szymborski: I don’t recall if there were. I prefer no domes. Or at least non-retractable domes.

7:07	Dan Szymborski: Baseball should be an outdoor game whenever possible

7:07	2-D: No staff predictions post?

7:07	Dan Szymborski: I think there is one, we did one!

7:08	Dodger Fan: If Dan is here, cat update?

7:08	Dan Szymborski: Three are sleeping. I can here Justinian in the hallway above me office still playing with that damn door toy.

7:08	Tony Wolfe: I believe they may have been waiting to post the predictions post until a decision was made on the playoff format

7:08	Tony Wolfe: Then the decision was…. unexpected

7:08	Dan Szymborski: This is my endless life now.

7:08	Dan Szymborski:

7:09	Narvain: Dan, what’s your percentage of certainty that baseball will happen this year now?

7:09	Dan Szymborski: Approaching 100%, but never reaching!

7:09	Ryan: Kershaw: Hall of Famer if he never pitches again?

7:09	Dan Szymborski: Yes

7:09	Tony Wolfe: Oh 100%

7:11	Tony Wolfe: Was a little surprised to see Kershaw is actually 2.8 wins short of the JAWS standard right now, and then remembered he’s only 32!

7:11	Estevao: Am I the only one that doesn’t understand why would Luhnow take part in a sign stealing scandal for competitive advantage when he built a powerhouse that would make the playoffs regardless. It killed his career

7:11	Dan Szymborski: Honestly, I think it’s more sloppiness and not paying enough attention to what was going on at the clubhouse level than him choosing to take part in this.

7:12	WBuffett: Money aside, what player from G1 tonight would you choose to start a franchise with?

7:12	Dan Szymborski: Without SOto probably Cole for me

7:12	Dan Szymborski: then Torres and Turner

7:12	Guest: Dan this is like when you go to a friend’s work event and realize he’s completely different with his colleagues.

7:12	Tony Wolfe: I think it’s probably Torres

7:14	brad penny for your thoughts: this first “game” is just MLB the show, it’s all a lie

7:14	Dan Szymborski: Not with this resolution!

7:14	JJ: Ron Fowler is the driving force behind the Padres two worst acquisitions of Kemp and Hosmer, change my mind.

7:14	Dan Szymborski: I won’t

7:14	LFC Mike: Dan..Is your answer to every question about a player going to be : “It’s July” for at least another week?

7:14	Dan Szymborski: Yeah, then August until the 23rd

7:14	JJ: Alex Rodriguez just called Scherzer’s curveball a “get-me-over curve”

7:14	Sgt. Pepper: Please make lonely Buster Olney a meme

7:15	Dan Szymborski: I swear, when A-Rod made his first appearances back at the end of his career, wasn’t he a lot better?

7:15	Dan Szymborski: Feels like his analysis has gotten lazier and generally worse

7:16	Dan Szymborski: Someone should tell him that Torres started 77 games at short last year.

7:16	Dan Szymborski: 73

7:16	guy who takes the lay up: buster lonely

7:16	Dodger Fan: I love how normal this feels

7:16	Dan Szymborski: It does feel like they’re playing in Miami

7:17	Dan Szymborski: And then there’s a HR

7:17	Anonymous: SMALL BALL GO FAR

7:17	Estevao: In an alternate reality with very subtle changes Kershaw has 6 Young’s, he should’ve beaten Dickey in 12, that one when he got hurt was a joke had he pitcher five clunkers more he would have easily won it and the year he got 300 K’s the competition was beyond the usual level.

7:17	Guest: I think they should leave all the home runs balls in place for the entire season

7:18	Waffles: Watching the ball get to bounce after a homerun is gonna be awesome

7:19	2-D: How many home run jokes are we going to have to endure where the punchline is along the lines of “the ball is practicing social distancing”?

7:19	Dan Szymborski: 7.5 per game

7:19	Oddball Herrera: Stanton just sent me from first to last in roto. Should I sell and play for next year?

7:19	Dan Szymborski: Yup, season’s like a quarter over already!

7:20	tb.25: feelsbadman Dan turned off emoji responses

7:20	Dan Szymborski: I didn’t set up the chat, so no emoji!

7:20	Dan Szymborski: Well, still FOR ME!

7:20	Dan Szymborski: 🤑🤑🤑🤑

7:21	ThQp: Are live stats going to be enabled on player pages? Trying to look up Stanton’s stat line for the season after that AB, but no dice

7:21	Dan Szymborski: Haven’t heard elsewise, I don’t really do that stuff!

7:21	marechal: So a DH homers in the first DH at bat ever in an NL park. Baseball!

7:21	Dan Szymborski: I have never heard of hankook tires

7:22	Dan Szymborski: should I have?

7:22	Oscar Gamble: ARod: It’s not a sprint, it’s a 9.7 mile run. Do the math!

7:23	Dan Szymborski: I’m sorry, but Lex Luger is the total package

7:23	5 Run Homer: Hankook advertises heavily on Hockey Night in Canada

7:23	Dan Szymborski: Yeah, I’m sure Gerrit Cole’s season will come down to if there’s a lot of nodding in the first 20 pitches.

7:24	Dan Szymborski: We all know that it comes down to odd number vs. even number leads.

7:24	Peter: Hankook is quite popular over here in the UK

7:24

jamesdakrn: Kershaw’s back will forever be a “what-if” to me.

before his first back injury in 2016, he was having a Pedro ’99 esque season –
121 IP 1.79 ERA, 1.67 FIP 5.3 fWAR in 16 starts

In the month of May ’16, he had more CGSO (3) than walks allowed (2) – 6 starts, 49.2 IP, 0.91 ERA 0.91 FIP, 2.9 fWAR

Afterwards, his velocity started dropping and he went from “best-pitcher-on-the-planet” Kershaw to “really-good-but-not-top-3” Kershaw

🙁

7:24	Dan Szymborski: His dropoff hasn’t been off to get a ZiPS Time Warp though! Maybe if he gets eaten by an elephant or something.l

7:24	Tony Wolfe: Is Eaton doing a subdued Soto shuffle?

7:24	Dan Szymborski: “There is Dave…..”

7:25	Dan Szymborski: I think you mean “What the World Series hangover means is nothing at all.”

7:25	Kiermaier’s Piercing Green Eyes: Seriously, MLB.TV subscribers, just listen to the radio broadcasts. Sync up with ESPN by pausing your stream or DVR. ESPN can’t hurt you here.

7:25	Oddball Herrera: No joke, today Google adchoices on your site came up with a Lockheed Martin ad for hypersonic missiles. They clearly found their target market!

7:25	Anonymous: Notable HR threat Adam Eaton

7:26	Estevao: Ball Juiced …

7:26	Dan Szymborski: It’s not a good sign when they run out of insightful things to say about the players in the bottom of the first of the first game.

7:26	Guest: That’s why Eaton hits second!

7:27	Dodger Fan: Here come the juiced ball comments

7:27	Anonymous: yikes, Gary Sanchez costing Cole strikes already

7:27	Waffles: Did they juice the juiced ball?

7:27	Michael Scarn: Apologies if you’ve answered this elsewhere – what type of team (i.e. lots of depth, star heavy, great rotation/bullpen/etc) would you expect to benefit the most from having a 60 game season and the other weird circumstances of the season?

7:28	Dan Szymborski: Depth and just averageish teams.

7:28	Guest: So we’re going to have another one of those “people only score via home run” seasons again? That was fun last year…

7:29	Dan Szymborski: So when Joe West opted out, did they simply pick the next most incompetent umpire to be crew chief?

7:29	Dan Szymborski: Wait, not West

7:29	Tony Wolfe: I’d still say those with a surplus of starters are at a pretty significant advantage — the Dodgers being able to go “oh, no Kershaw? Fine, here’s Dustin May” is a luxury most teams don’t have

7:29	Kiermaier’s Piercing Green Eyes: Crowd noise needs to be indignant about bad ball/strike calls.

7:29	2-D: AJ Hinch is yelling at the TV that Cole should still be on the bench.

7:29	Adam Z: More people in this chat or in the stadium?

7:30	Dan Szymborski: Chat

7:30	Guest: Is depth more important in 60 games or 162 games?

7:30	Dan Szymborski: Normally, 162

7:30	Dan Szymborski: but there’s a special circumstance with this 60 games

7:30	Dodger Fan: How many are in the chat?

7:30	Tony Wolfe: Like, the Angels having a few late scratches could be horrifying

7:30	Dan Szymborski: 172 right now

7:31	5 Run Homer: Whyyyyy did they show a dramatic slow-mo of Fauci’s pitch

7:31	Estevao: Greinke is a candidate for the Hall of Fame and I really have no clue what would he wear

7:31	desertfox9139: seriously, what happens if 9 players test positive simultaneously for the same team?

7:32	Dylan: Which Cubs gets more MVP votes? Bryant, Baez, or Contreras?

7:32	Dan Szymborski: I don’t think they actually know

7:32	Anonymous: Sad that Dan didn’t get to spam “April” as answers to small-sample-size freakouts this year 🙁

7:32	Dan Szymborski: I’ll just be spamming a different month

7:32	Peter: Greinke would be in Angels red obviously!

7:32	Dan Szymborski: Greinke should show up wearing the cap of a team he never played for

7:33	Oscar Gamble: Is getting to pick your opponents part of the new playoff agreement?

7:33	Dan Szymborski: I’m still not sure what the core is. Did we evolve and grow a new part I don’t know?

7:34	Dan Szymborski: Yes

7:35	Fangraph’s Lurker: I could see Greinke asking to design his own hat for the hall

7:35	desertfox9139: if POC tests were 80 percent accurate, how many tests would each player have to take in order to be 99.9 percent sure he is not positive

7:35	Dan Szymborski: Don’t make me think

7:35	Dan Szymborski: 4

7:36	Pieman: Will home field advantage matter this season?

7:36	Dan Szymborski: I’m not sure – I haven’t found that teams with less attendance had smaller HFA

7:36	Kiermaier’s Piercing Green Eyes: Greinke with the backwards cap. Problem solved.

7:37	Tony Wolfe: NYT just had a story a few weeks ago talking about how the empty stadiums have affected soccer games https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/01/sports/soccer/soccer-without-fans-g…

7:37	Tony Wolfe: Baseball fans are obviously much different behaving, though

7:37	Kvn: Yanks hitters’ timing looks pretty off. Bet there will be a lot of late swings in the early going.

7:37	Adam: On # of tests, infinite if the 20% error is systematic — like misses certain cases — not random.

7:38	asnbrv: Does statcast usually need time to get up to speed? theres no way all Coles pitches are 4seamers with mid80 break. Ive noticed way more weird pitch categorization in the practice games too.

7:38	Dan Szymborski: Maybe still working out the hawkeye stuff?

7:38	Jonesy Wales: I think it’s mostly a classification issue–Dillon Maples was definitely not throwing 88MPH fastballs last night

7:38	Estevao: I understand your point about Luhnow but that’s even worse. How can you be so clueless to allow such a scenario where the biggest downside is on you

7:39	Dan Szymborski: Gotta go with Hanlon’s razor

7:39	Anonymous: Baby Jays gonna set some records at Camden this year

7:39	Dan Szymborski: Poor O’s.

7:39	Dan Szymborski: Look at their roster

7:39	Dan Szymborski: Just read the whole thing

7:39	Guest: Not watching. How’s the fake crowd noise?

7:39	See! You! Later!: https://www.mlb.com/cheer/630851/remote

7:39	Dan Szymborski: It doesn’t count unless you can actually boo

7:39	Dan Szymborski: or each IP gets a jeer to play every game

7:40	Tony Wolfe: have trash can bangs ready for when the astros visit

7:40	Oddball Herrera: Poor O’s their only good player from last year has a bum colon…..

7:40	Kvn: What Dan you’re not pumped for the Tommy Milone experience?

7:41	Dan Szymborski: Milone had to check the roster to see if HE was on the team

7:41	rusty shackleford: i forgot edinson volquez started in two world series games… and his team won that world series

7:41	Guest: If they go the route of digitally adding crowd noise to broadcasts they need to make sure it is realistic. For example, total silence for all games played in Florida and the occasional racial slur in Boston

7:41	2-D: What are they going to do with all these extra baseballs that usually end up in the stands?

7:41	Dan Szymborski: One reason I’m sad that credentials are limited this year.

7:41	Dan Szymborski: Usually with the badge, you can just walk right in.

7:41	Dan Szymborski: I could finish the season with 20-30 homers I bet!

7:42	asnbrv: You’d think if ESPN had justification to crank up bat contact noises as if they are some kind of bombing, its this season, but I guess not.

7:42	Dan Szymborski: Crank down A-Rod sounds

7:42	desertfox9139: the cubs are sending the balls to the season ticket holder of the seat where the ball landed

7:42	Dan Szymborski: Really?

7:42	Dan Szymborski: That’s cool

7:43	desertfox9139: https://ontapsportsnet.com/2020/07/23/cubs-season-ticket-holders-to-re…

7:43	Dan Szymborski: Oh, I wasn’t doubting you, I just had missed it

7:43	Dodger Fan: Broadcast said 97 – that looked like a curve to me

7:43	Guest: But the Cubs have a GoFundMe for the postage. Dan, please contribute.

7:43	Dan Szymborski: THERE AIN”T NO MONEY IN BASEBALL!!!!1111

7:44	desertfox9139: I didnt think you were. just wanted to double check my reference!!

7:44	Sgt. Pepper: The echo from (what i assume is) the studio on bat contact is irritating

7:44	Tony Wolfe: what on earth is matt talking about

7:44	Dodger Fan: A-Rod has made little sense tonight

7:44	Dan Szymborski: Evergreen

7:44	Adam Z: I hope Arod buys the mets so we don’t have to listen to him doing play by play anymore

7:45	Wireless Joe Jackson: Today’s games are tough. I guess I’m a Nats well-wisher, in that I don’t wish them any specific harm. Yankees and Dodgers are like rooting for your least favorite billionaires. I was forced to curse the Giants to a decade of futility after 2014.

7:45	JaAm: Did Gerrit Cole thrown all fastballs up until the 0-2 pitch to Stevenson or can I not trust Statcast yet?

7:45	Wireless Joe Jackson: Surely the Cubs can have an unpaid intern deliver the balls in their personal vehicle.

7:45	Dodger Fan: That commercial didn’t age well

7:45	Oddball Herrera: Anything ARod says is progress over the even/odd leads claim

7:45	Shoeless Tim: Dog sweatshirt

7:45	jamesdakrn: re: crowd noise also need to add dodger crowd noises slowly coming in after the 3rd inning

7:46	Dodger Fan: MasterCard: “Start something priceless” …like the Dodgers’ rotation!

7:46	Adam Z: My dog barked at the tv when that other dog got a yankees shirt. We live just outside of Boston. He is a good boy.

7:46	Dan Szymborski: When my sister was away and I was feeding her cats, I put one of her cats in a steelers shirt and took pictures of the cat to send her. She was so pissed!

7:47	Anonymous: Tyler Wade, please don’t bunt. I don’t know you, but I know you’re better than that.

7:47	Estevao: I miss Vin Scully? Most likeable human in the history of the world

7:47	Shoeless Tim: Wade double rn

7:47	Guest: Sisters’ cats’ names?

7:47	Dan Szymborski: Tesla and Darwin

7:47	Anonymous: 65-grade cat names

7:47	Dodger Fan: “Last year [LeMahieu] almost won the MVP”

7:48	Dodger Fan: That is grossly untrue

7:48	Dan Szymborski: Dammit, I’m like 5 seconds behind you guys

7:48	Tony Wolfe: What, you don’t think receiving zero first place votes counts as almost winning?

7:49	Tony Wolfe: Same, Dan

7:49	Dodger Fan: Sorry Dan!

7:49	Dan Szymborski: It’s just funny when I get the criticism of the analysis before the analysis!

7:49	Dan Szymborski: So it’s like a prophecy being foretold

7:49	JaAm: Kevin Pillar also almost won MVP last season

7:49	Anonymous: oh snap, Tyler Wade apparently steals bases. Will he steal a taco for america? Is that promotion over? Stay tuned!

7:49	Dan Szymborski: I want a promotion in which I can un-eat Taco Bell tacos I did as a youngster

7:50	Hire Joe Morgan?: As a Mets fan, I’m in position of explaining to my daughter why we’re rooting for the Yankees on Opening Day. She’s already internalized the proper view of Yankees, of course. This fits the season, I suppose.

7:50	Adam Z: Arod says something nonsensical

7:50	Dan Szymborski: Thankfully evergreen

7:50	JJ: Is “X almost won the MVP” the new “everyone’s ceiling is the best player in baseball”

7:50	brad: With a little effort I’ve managed to sync the radio broadcast on the MLB app to the game and escaped ARod, just to suggest an option

7:50	Dan Szymborski: I keep forgetting that Hicks still exists.

7:50	Oddball Herrera: The taco promotion is still on, but if more than one person handles the taco it must be thrown out

7:50	5 Run Homer: This strike zone sure is something

7:51	Dan Szymborski:

7:51	5 Run Homer: Hicks is real good!

7:51	Guest: If you live somewhere where it’s worth driving to Taco Bell for a free taco, it’s time to move.

7:51	Quarantino Martinez: Hicks doesn’t exist. Tupac hologram.

7:52	Dan Szymborski: I should be nice to Matt, he had to say my name for MLB the Show this year!

7:52	Anonymous: going down 0-2 to max scherzer must be one of the worst feelings on the planet

7:52	Dan Szymborski: nice pitch there

7:52	Tony Wolfe: that was filthy

7:53	Dan Szymborski: The crowd noise is awkwardly timed after events.

7:53	Dan Szymborski: It peaks too quickly and then dies off to fast.

7:53	Dan Szymborski: too fast

7:53	JaAm: Over/Under on the “No Arguments” rule being broken is 4.5 innings

7:53	Anonymous: a lot of folks forgot Aaron Judge was good at baseball, i’m not naming names

7:53	Dan Szymborski: When he’s good, he’s going to get outs, when he’s bad, he’s not going to get outs and allow homers!

7:54	Tony Wolfe: “He thinks he is better than you in the strike zone.”

7:54	Tony Wolfe: CRANK

7:54	only correct takes: i like the piped in ambient crowd noise but the cheers are terrible. like no stadium is cheering that hard for a 3rd inning popout

7:54	Anonymous: okay i’ll name names. JUSTIN. PAUL. FIGURE IT OUT.

7:54	5 Run Homer: The phantom catcher’s mitt on that tunnelling graphic is hilarious

7:55	Quarantino Martinez: Spitting!!!!

7:55	Dan Szymborski: SUSPENDED~!

7:55	See! You! Later!: where are you in the show

7:55	Dan Szymborski: We’re in the ASG week.

7:55	Dodger Fan: Only correct takes, you clearly haven’t been to a Dodger Stadium playoff game

7:56	5 Run Homer: Stanton’s batting stance is lowkey weird as hell

7:56	Anonymous: oh right. Giancarlo Stanton does that a lot too

7:56	Tony Wolfe: is “giancarlo stanton almost played tight end” the antithesis of “antonio gates was a basketball player”?

7:57	SDP: Tyler Wade scored from first?? That ball was hit hard! And Stevenson cut it off!

7:57	JaAm: I think it’s more like “Tyler Wade is running like a wide receiver going from 1st to Home”

7:58	Dan Szymborski: See, these ads of people biking and running alongside dangerous cliffs doesn’t make me want to go to Dick’s

7:59	Kvn: RIP Modell’s. Dick’s out here rubbing it in.

7:59	Dan Szymborski: That’s not really TWO kitchens Chipotle

8:00	Dan Szymborski: There are still other writers, it’ nost JUST Butter

8:00	Dan Szymborski: Buster

8:00	Guest: Dick Pole turns 70 this year.

8:00	Dodger Fan: “Secondary leadoff man” Victor Robles

8:00	rusty shackleford: one doesn’t usually associate jogging or biking with danger

8:00	5 Run Homer: Look at all those people not distancing

8:00	Dodger Fan: Did he just call Robles…Soto?

8:01	Oddball Herrera: Looks like Fauci has entered the pantheon of all time terrible first pitches. How hard is it people?!

8:01	Dan Szymborski: He’s 79!

8:02	Tony Wolfe: It is weird to talk a bunch about how there aren’t fans in the stands because of the safety regulations and then show a bunch of people outside the park sitting exactly as close to each other as they would be in the stadium

8:02	Dan Szymborski:

8:02	Dodger Fan: WEAR MASKS GUYS – I’m talking to you people walking the game from other buildings

8:02	Guest: For those of us not watching, are they social distancing on the bench?

8:02	Dan Szymborski: Not particularly

8:03	Dan Szymborski: I do find it funny that there’s this group of writers horrified that players are being forced to play baseball at all

8:03	Dan Szymborski: while all these players are mostly “whatever”

8:03	Quarantino Martinez: But they’re not as packed as usual, imo

8:03	Dan Szymborski: No, but it’s not six feet either

8:03	JaAm: Teams should just let something like 3 fans into the stadium nosebleeds

8:03	Advice From A-Rod: The winner will be the team that scores the most runs

8:03	Dan Szymborski: I think what happens is there gets some creeping there

8:03	Dan Szymborski: first it’s 3 and then it’s 6

8:03	Dan Szymborski: and then you’re like eric cartman letting the first 11,000 people in so that you can pay the pitcher

8:03	only correct takes: ok maybe it is carly rae jespen lmao i don’t think i’ve seen that one

8:04	Kvn: “Alex you can speak to this better than any of us…” I doubt it.

8:04	Dan Szymborski: Alex should be proud of how those negotiations went? And the leadership from ownership?

8:04	Dan Szymborski: I can smell Manfred’s butt on A-Rod’s nose from here.

8:04	Oddball Herrera: There is a group of sports writers who have one schtick – be outraged and accuse people of being greedy. Not in the least surprised they are trying to generate pushback against starting the season, because that’s their thing

8:05	Dan Szymborski: Here’s the thing about this, it’s important to not gratuitously ban things because then you erode support for the actual things you need to ban

8:05	Dan Szymborski: At least, that’s my opinion

8:05	Dan Szymborski: Like the whole baseball SHOULDN’T be played, even if fewer players get sick and there are no fans

8:06	Dan Szymborski: becuase of some moral preening about how some aspect of life that people enjoy being going is an outrage evne if there’s no specific danger.

8:06	Dan Szymborski: MLB’s plan hasn’t been perfect and can be improved, but I have serious doubts that any more players will get COVID than would have otherwise.

8:06	Dan Szymborski: And a LOT would have without baseball. These are 20-40 year-old athletes, many rich. They’d be at beaches and bars and so on

8:07	Dan Szymborski: I’m not going to pick on any writer in paricularly, but that’s how I feel

8:07	Anonymous: how many umps opted out?

8:07	Dan Szymborski: 10 or so?

8:07	Anonymous: BRO this strike zone

8:07	homealone: to back up that point, just look at how many NBA players were partying and tested positive between the time the league shut down and the bubble started

8:07	Dan Szymborski: Baseball had that superspreader birthday party and that underground baseball club league

8:08	Tony Wolfe: I don’t necessarily think anyone individually is more at risk than they might have been otherwise, I just worry about how fast it could spread once one guy does have it

8:08	Andy: I think there’s some value to the society to have baseball back, even under weird shortened-season rules. Maybe they should have started the season with Marlins vs. Royals. Then Matty V could ask “is it ok for us to play baseball” and ARod could answer “Yes, but this isn’t baseball”

8:09	Dan Szymborski: That’s not to say MLB shouldn’t have rules to follow. They should! And I think their plan is reasonable, if not perfect.

8:09	Tony Wolfe: And sending them all over the country skeeves me out

8:09	chumpy: I think this is enough pitches to say that Scherzer is officially washed.

8:09	Dan Szymborski: He’s had a lot of sweat even for the weather

8:10	Dan Szymborski:

8:10	Wire Fan: It is good to see the layoff hasn’t affected Angel Hernandez’s bad umpiring skills

8:10	Oddball Herrera: Agreed – I am not sure if many writers aren’t good at expressing that a choice must be made from many imperfect options, or if the public doesn’t want to read that content, but discourse suffers for it either way

8:11	Dan Szymborski: Now, I think anyone who wants to opt-out ought to, with no slights targeted at their character. Allowing people to opt-out is what makes allowing people to opt-in an ethical possibility

8:11	Guest: Now that baseball is back, who feels healed?!?

8:11	Dan Szymborski: Not healed, but I feel a bit better!

8:11	homealone: Scherzer is washed? with 8 strikeouts in the fourth?

8:11	Dan Szymborski: I was under the impression it was sarcasm

8:11	Dodger Fan: I felt healed before the Kershaw news

8:11	alex rodriguez: laughing harder at my own joke than the person i’m talking to

8:11	Dan Szymborski: Hey, I’m in that boat a lot

8:12	Dan Szymborski: Normally when I post the neural network things that I think I find way funnier than anyone else does

8:12	kevinthecomic: Skinny Voit hasn’t been able to catch up to the fastball yet

8:12	Dodger Fan: So A-Rod and I finally have something in common

8:12	Tony Wolfe: Isn’t Chris Sale the all-time K/9 leader? Or did I not see an innings qualifier

8:13	Dan Szymborski: Given the spread of COVID-19, I’m not sure we “earned” the season

8:13	Dave: Sports are the reward for a functioning society, or if billionaires really want to make more money

8:13	Dan Szymborski: I don’t buy that line at all.

8:13	Dan Szymborski: Sporst are the product of people who voluntarily want to produce sporting events meeting with peopel who voluntarily want to play in those sporting events.

8:13	Dan Szymborski: And most societies have had some form of sport, whether everything’s run smoothly or not

8:14	Wire Fan: What i find odd is media questioning baseball’s plan and logistics yet seemingly having no issue with college and pro football… Which is going to be an absolute nightmare.

8:14	Dan Szymborski: Football was always kind of screwed

8:14	Tony Wolfe: I just don’t think those sports have put forth much of a plan to criticize

8:15	Dan Szymborski: Even if football was more confident, the sport itself causes problems.

8:15	Tony Wolfe: And I have seen the NFL taking more heat lately

8:15	Dan Szymborski: The sport of football, in terms of human contact, is a clothed orgy.

8:16	Dan Szymborski: More players touch each other in a single play of football than in an entire game of baseball

8:16	Shirtless George Brett: What I find funny is that MLB’s plan was deemed bad enough for Canada to just kick the Jays out of the country and everyone just kind of went “meh” and moved on.

8:16	Dan Szymborski: If it had been hockey, they would have burned down Ottawa

8:16	Anonymous: College football is more important to healing the nation because the athletes aren’t paid. Overhead cost is a key factor in healing

8:16	Guest: From a predictive standpoint who would be considered to have a better start? Obviously the 8 Ks compared to 3 is impressive, but it also seems that the Yankees have more consistently barreled Scherzer?

8:16	Dan Szymborski: It’s a game, it really doesn’t have predictive value

8:16	complains about pointless things: i hate the phrase ‘winner take all’

8:17	Dan Szymborski: World Series Game 7, where winner takes a majority of the revenue!

8:17	Dan Szymborski: Not as good a catchphrase

8:18	JaAm: “Winner wins”

8:19	Dodger Fan: “Royals, Matt Harvey nearing deal.”

8:19	Dan Szymborski: Do you really near a minor league deal? You either have one or you don’t

8:20	Dan Szymborski: Speaking of my obnoxious neural network games…

8:20

Dan Szymborski: Completion

Top Nicknames for New York Yankees Players

Gary Sanchez – Stubborn

Craig Kimbrel – The Gazebo

Matt Holliday – The Colonel

Brian McCann – Pete

Gary Sanchez – Farley

Jack Cust – Old Man Out

Noah Syndergaard – The Cheese Chef

Max Scherzer – The Crown Prince

Alex Rodriguez – Bruiser

Noah Syndergaard – The Judge

8:20	brad: The shifting time delay between the radio and ESPN feed is making me look forward to the games this year when it happens during a broadcast and one or the other is a few pitches ahead for a while

8:20	chumpy: How are the cats? …still catting?

8:20	Dan Szymborski: Justinian stopped thumping away about 10 minutes ago after about 5 minutes with that damn door toy

8:20	Anonymous: i think they should have a different trophy this year, and re-create Pandemic Ball every 10 years with a 60-game sprint featuring a 16-team postseason

8:21	Dan Szymborski: What happened to not disclosing this?

8:22	Dan Szymborski: Completion Top Nicknames for Washington Nationals Players Juan Soto – “Pudge” Adam LaRoche – “Toussaint” Jeff Francoeur – “Sugartip” Wilson Ramos – “Shrimp” Joe Ross – “Homer.” Ozuna – “Shrimp” McGwire – “Mr. Someday”

8:22	Rick: Man seeing the last out by Daniel Hudson is pretty awesome. good for him

8:22	Andrew: Just the sugartip

8:22	Dan Szymborski: I don’t think you can really count COVID-19 as a special bit of adversity for a team since literally everybody has to deal with the exact same thing

8:23	Hire Joe Morgan?: I think Dan should respond “April” anyway to all questions.

8:23	Dodger Fan: Lightning warning. Thanks, 2020

8:23	Hire Joe Morgan?: Questions related to sample size, obviously, not tacos or whatever. We need real answers to those.

8:23	Anonymous: BREAKING NEWS: Alex Rodriguez likes a bunt.

8:23	JaAm: Davey Martinez: “Juan Soto is asymptomatic and should rejoin the team soon” ARod: “How will you win this season without Juan Soto?”

8:23	Commander Canteloupe: Doesn’t it seem likely prolonged indoor exposure is orders of magnitude more dangerous than any outdoor activity? For both NFL and MLB the travel seems like the dangerous part, not the game.

8:23	Anonymous: oh so THAT’S why wade was bunting

8:23	big news guy: small ball is back, everyone

8:23	5 Run Homer: Of course there’s inclement weather tonight

8:24	Tony Wolfe: had a rain delay on KBO Opening Day!

8:24	Tony Wolfe: it’s inevitable

8:24

Dan Szymborski: Top Nicknames for Washington Nationals Players

Juan Soto – Zizou, Mr. Z

Domingo Acevedo – El Nino, Freezer

Antonio Bastardo – Bleu, Ho

Timur Aduriz – Mazola, Marmol

Armando Díaz – Dawg, Zorilla

Ryne Sandberg – High Stuff

Carlos Rodon – No-Scroll, Rachio

Jayson Werth – Icky-Ticky, Voodoo

8:24	Quarantino Martinez: Zombie small ball!

8:24	Kvn: It’s DC in July what are you gonna do?

8:24	Dodger Fan: In LA. Can confirm that Dodgers-Giants shouldn’t have inclement weather later.

8:24	Quarantino Martinez: Wait, did he just use “taking your temperature” metaphorically?

8:25	Charlie: Does Bird Law demand the Blue Jays play in Baltimore?

8:25	Dan Szymborski: The state of bird law in this country!

8:25	Hire Joe Morgan?: Do you think if ARod buys the Mets he’ll join their broadcast team? That would be sad.

8:25	Dodger Fan: Does A-Rod buying the Mets force Pete Alonso to bunt?

8:26	Tony Wolfe: Hahahahaha A-Rod loves everything the rest of us hate

8:26	Tony Wolfe: it’s a good bit, honestly

8:28	Tony Wolfe: “I was texting with Mike Trout” sick brag buster

8:28	Dan Szymborski:

8:29	Tony Wolfe: wow

8:29

Guest: Haven’t watched TV for half a year. Not for moralistic reasons or anything––just got bored of it. In the middle of a pandemic I decided it might be nice and provide some relief to watch a ballgame again. It took an hour and a half for the TV to upload all the shizzle and junk it needed to upload since I left and I was like, “nuh-uh,” I’ll read FG, from here on out. I like the conversation and socialization more than I like the dingers.

8:29	Andrew: ESPN’s ball tracker thing is really quite phallic

8:29	Dodger Fan: It feels as if this bad zone has favored the Nats today

8:29	marz: ESPN Chyron just said playoffs have been expanded to 16 teams????

8:29	Dan Szymborski: Yup

8:29	Dan Szymborski: For 2020

8:29	Dan Szymborski: It BETTER be only for 2020.

8:31	Dan Szymborski: If owners propose it for 2021, someone at the MLBPA ought to sit down the players and make sure it’s clear that larger playoffs means team quality is less important which means players are less valuable, which means continued downward pressure on salaries.

8:31	matt vasgersian: hey man do u have any recollection of ur career, which was one of the greatest in a dearly beloved industry

8:32	Kvn: Camera work has not been great so far…

8:32	Dodger Fan: I just imagined A-Rod and John Rocker getting into a fight over New York baseball fans

8:32	Hire Joe Morgan?: Are there any details yet on the playoff format? Top two per division and two wild cards? Division winners and five wild cards? Top eight teams?

8:32	Dan Szymborski: top two per division and then the others

8:32	Tony Wolfe: We obviously haven’t played any of the season so it’s hard to say this for sure, but at least the playoff field getting expanded happened in a year in which there are 16 teams that have a reasonable playoff roster

8:33	Oddball Herrera: Ew, all second place teams automatically make the playoffs regardless of record. Which division produces a team that has no business being there? I guess…

8:33	JaAm: The most unsurprising thing is ARod being more impressed with Stanton’s opposite-field single than his 460 foot homer

8:33	Dodger Fan: @Kvn – operators had to leave posts due to weather

8:33	Tony Wolfe: If this happened in 2017 for example, there would be… four teams in the postseason with losing records? including the 77-85 Marlins?

8:33	5 Run Homer: Great players as announcers is always weird

8:33	Dan Szymborski: Morgan

8:34	Dan Szymborski: At times, Morgan seemed like he literally had no idea why he was a great player.

8:34	homealone: what is the Yankees’ BABIP as a team so far this game?

8:34	Dan Szymborski: lemme check

8:34	Kvn: @Dodger Fan – Thanks! I didn’t realize that. Have the sound off.

8:35	Dan Szymborski: .444 BABIP for the Yankees

8:35	Dodger Fan: @Kvn – That’s smart. You’re not hearing…the “analysis”

8:35	YardGoat: Based on the ZIPS projected standings there would be 4 teams tied for the final 3 playoff spots in the NL. I’m hoping for a four-way tie at the top of the NL Central this year

8:36	Dan Szymborski: Nats Babip .000 (o for 9)

8:36	Media People: Dan, after those controversial comments and use of logic RE: the virus, you’ll never work in this town again!!

8:36	chumpy: When you read the name Aaron do you read it as A. A. Ron?

8:36	Dan Szymborski: I like how Aaron Blake of the WaPo is A.A. Ron Balakay

8:36	Kvn: Honestly I don’t listen to the commentary a lot anymore for most crews. Park noise feed all the way.

8:36	Dan Szymborski: I had Aaron Blair as A.A. Ron Blair in ZiPS DMB disk for a few years but it pissed people off

8:36	Media People: “You’re siding with BILLiOnaIReS”

8:37	Dan Szymborski: “Unless you’re a personal friend, that’s Williamaires to you.”

8:37	JaAm: Not surprised Kershaw has a stiff back driving around like that

8:37	Dodger Fan: Ok that was harsh, sorry A-Roid

8:37	JaAm: I don’t doubt San Diego or Arizona’s ability to have a good season but having 2 teams guaranteed out of the NL West feels wrong

8:37	Quarantino Martinez: Sanchez getting too close to the Nats dugout on that foul ball!

8:37	Fangraph’s Lurker: Here’s to losing record teams in the playoffs

8:37	Anonymous: i think it’s weird that A-Rod is getting in on the “2020 is the WORST” stuff when he’s set for life with a loving partner and a job he loves, but that’s none of my business

8:37	Dan Szymborski: Him essentially talking up the salary cap after making big money from there not being a saslary cap was sad

8:38	Kvn: Lol the green screen for the budlight ad wasnt keyed right for a sec and cole’s head was transparent.

8:39	Dan Szymborski: Like Charlie’s green shirt in Lethal Weapon 5

8:39	alex rodriguez: hey anonymous, i might lose on my bid to own an mlb team. these are tough times for everyone

8:40	Quarantino Martinez: Fake fans thought that foul ball had a chance

8:40	Wire Fan: Have they said what home road is for that first best of three playoff series? All 3 games at higher seed? Or 1-2 format?

8:40	Dan Szymborski: Don’t think they’ve outlined it all yet

8:40	Brian: Hello friends, you have no idea how happy I am to be back in a live baseball chat!!!!!

8:40	Guest: What is chat volume like?

8:40	Dan Szymborski: It’s text so it’s kinda soft

8:40	Dodger Fan: At this rate I’ll be out of laptop battery by the third inning of Cueto v. Kers—-May

8:41	Dodger Fan: Hi Brian! Welcome

8:41	MC Batcat: I think the Dodgers have a court order that keeps Angel Hernandez from entering the stadium

8:41	Kvn: Is Andrew Stevenson a contest winner or something?

8:42	Brian: That is a cool graphic of paused release points on Cole… more of that please.

8:42	marz: Jayson Stark saying that all three games of the best-of-three series will be played at the home park of the higher seed. No travel days.

8:42	Brian: Thanks, even though you are a dodgers fan!

8:42	Charlie: Game is giving off a realBetween the no crowd, two

8:43	Dodger Fan: mutters must be a Giants fan sighs

8:43	pittsburgh resident: yes let’s dunk on the pirates about cole. i haven’t heard this one before

8:43	Brian: I think the yankees should fill their stands with cutouts of the monopoly man… suggestions for other teams?

8:44	brad: Seems the radio announcers will be getting the same onscreen graphics we do from tv broadcasts. They also mentioned having two monitors, one on the bullpens

8:44	Wire Fan: Should the umpires be wearing gloves? At least the HP ump?

8:44	Dodger Fan: Trevor Bauer enters room

8:44	Dan Szymborski: I love Bauer’s ability to get everyone annoyed. I wish more players were like that.

8:44	Thanks, Mo Bamba: I told you not to call me here

8:44	Brian: Is the Cleveland Eerie the best possible name for the baseball team near the lake or just an excellent one?

8:44	Fangraph’s Lurker: Personally I’d love for the marlins stadium to be full of nothing but marlin’s man cut outs

8:45	Dan Szymborski: I like going to something classic like the spiders

8:45	Wire Fan: Remember when the Pirates were considered ahead of the curve on pitching?

8:45	Dodger Fan: GREAT pitch to end the 5th

8:45

Dave: Yeah, the country is burning. 140+ thousand people are dead. Testing for citizens is entirely inadequate in supply and speed. 28 Million are about to be evicted. Secret Police are being deployed by the White House. But hey, the people a little icky about providing resources to the entertainment industry are the illogical ones.

8:45	Dan Szymborski: One has nothing to do with the other. MLB did not do or cause any of these things to happen.

8:46	Dan Szymborski: This is on the level of “How dare you have a wedding while Tibet isn’t free!” It’s not connected in any way.

8:46	Dan Szymborski: MLB announcing tonight that the season is over would fix none of these things.

8:46	Dan Szymborski: At all, in any way whatsoever.

8:47	Kvn: Sir this is a baseball chat.

8:47	Brian: Im fine with that, I just think there is all kinds of fun macabre themes that could be had with the eerie and fog rolling in off the lake and spooky cool fireworks night themes and the like

8:47	pittsburgh resident: to wire fan: they did resurrect some guys careers i.e. aj burnett, liriano, ja happ, etc. but their development and treatment of guys that actually had talent was trash

8:47	Dan Szymborski: I just don’t like abstract team mascot names.

8:47	Thanks, Mo Bamba: y’all, the ball is juiced and it will make this more fun

8:48	Kvn: The Cleveland Wet Sox

8:48	Tony Wolfe: gross

8:48	Wire Fan: So down on the Seattle Krakens (NHL)?

8:48	Dan Szymborski: krakens aren’t abstract

8:48	Dan Szymborski: I like krakens!

8:48	Dan Szymborski: or kraken

8:48	Guest: No streakers this year

8:48	Guest: But it’s a Kraken singular

8:48	Dan Szymborski: But it’s a thing

8:48	Brian: A spider playing baseball is not abstract?!? I am of course joking, I also just really like bad puns.

8:48	Dodger Fan: The Cleveland Clevelanders! 😐

8:49	MSW: Seattle Karens

8:49	Dan Szymborski: The Cleveland Ennui

8:49	Dan Szymborski: Can they steal Lake Monsters from Vermont?

8:49	Jorge Posadism: Gary Sanchez and swinging at down and away sliders…

8:49	Guest2: The Cleveland Old Ones

8:49	Dodger Fan: I should probably open that booing app just for Manfred

8:49	Brian: I also like the Cleveland landers

8:49	JaAm: What is the consensus on number team names (76ers, 49ers)

8:50	Dodger Fan: Rename the city to Cleve, call the team the Landers

8:50	Tony Wolfe: 51s!

8:50	Tony Wolfe: I love number names

8:50	Wire Fan: The Cleveland baseball team. CBT is a good baseball acronym.

8:50	Dan Szymborski: I suspect all three letter abbreviations have been taken by SOMEthing horrible

8:50	Brian: although with landers the astros kinda have the space theme already

8:51	Dan Szymborski: The Astros barely use the space theme.

8:51	Dan Szymborski: There wasn’t anything even techy about their cheating. I mean, trash can banging?

8:51	JaAm: You liked the Utah Jazz and St. Louis Blues, now get ready for the Cleveland Trap!

8:51	Dan Szymborski: “..and also whatever nonsense I make up in the next 24 hours.”

8:51	Andrew: The Cleveland Rocks!

8:51	YardGoat: This expanded playoff format was so slapdash that the announcers don’t even know what the deal is

8:52	marz: Manfred says it’s straight-up seeded playoffs, no byes. 1 vs 8, 2 vs 7, etc.

8:52	Dave: Tibet being free has absolutely nothing to do with allocation of scarce resources.

8:52	Dan Szymborski: Nor does this.

8:53	Tom: Rain delay for the season starter is very fitting.

8:53	Dan Szymborski: NO LEAVE ROB OUT THERE

8:53	YardGoat: How often do you think Manfred watches a full baseball game beginning to end?

8:53	Tony Wolfe: ah crabapples

8:54	Dan Szymborski: He usually leaves before the ninth quarter is done, no matter who has more points.

8:54

Guest:

8:54	Dodger Fan: MLB is just copying the KBO

8:54	Sgt. Pepper: I’m very concerned about baseball being played in the middle of a pandemic which is why I’m going to watch a baseball game and also participate in a baseball live chat on a site for baseball nerds.

8:54	Dan Szymborski: By chatting here, you’ve delayed the vaccine by months!

8:54	Brian CashGod: That groundskeeper lmfao

8:56	This is lude-i-cris: My kid made me rewind so we could laugh at him trying to run again

8:56	chumpy: off of the top of your head, what do you know about Dustin May?

8:57	Dan Szymborski: His mom used to have a tv show

8:57	Dan Szymborski:

8:57	Kvn: Red hair

8:57	Guest: red hair

8:57	Brian: Sgt. Pepper is a hypocrite and so am I, although I am actively also participating in an anti baseball chat.

8:57	Wire Fan: Was Jose Quintana’s IL related to him cutting himself washing dishes?

8:57	JaAm: I know Dustin May is now the face of redhead baseball players, and that’s all I need to know

8:57	Dan Szymborski: I tore my wrist tripping over a cat

8:58	Daniel: He can eat 30 hotdogs in 7 min

8:58	Dan Szymborski: slidery thing, throws hard

8:59	Dan Szymborski: I think his slider moves like a knuckle curve but I got shouted down when I suggested that

8:59	Dodger Fan: Dustin May would prefer not to be compared to Noah Syndergaard (which is…kinda a fair one to make) and thus dislikes the nickname “Gingergaard”

8:59	Dan Szymborski: The Gingergaard sounds like Carrot Top’s shock troopers

8:59	Quarantino Martinez: The Cleveland Cuyahoga! And once a year you set the mascot on fire.

9:00	Dan Szymborski: You sir, have just written the next Wicker Man remake.

9:00	Brian CashGod: Nats Park scoreboard says “Please Exit the Seating Bowl” because of the thunderstorm…mission accomplished?

9:00	Dave K: With the playoff expansion today. Does this make the Yankees, Astros and Dodgers locks into the postseason? Or as much as locks can be?

9:00	kevinthecomic: Oh good, rain delay means more A-Rod!!

9:00	Dodger Fan: Could this chat let me know when we are close to resuming so that I may return to the TV?

9:00	Zack: There will be no rain delay during the nightcap.

9:00	Brian: Does this mean we can refer to the trump gestapo as the Cheeto’s brigade?

9:01	Dan Szymborski: Cheetoh Bandito

9:01	Guest: All mascots should be set on fire once a year. For a new mascot to arise from the ashes like a Phoenix. Except the Phillie Phantic whom will remain unburned much like Daenerys from Game of Thrones

9:01	Tony Wolfe: Speaking very charitably about randomness of a shortened season, I’d say the Astros are more likely to finish third in their division than the Yankees and Dodgers?

9:01	Guest: Not the bees!

9:01	Tony Wolfe: but yeah, they’re in

9:01	JaAm: Vasgersian just said “exotic stats” and I think the should catch on

9:01	Dan Szymborski: Makes my job sound sexier

9:01	Dan Szymborski: Oil me up, here come the EXOTIC stats.

9:01	Dodger Fan: Yeah I’m in LA, as the username would suggest. Beautiful day here

9:01	Dan Szymborski: The username suggests your fandom, your location is only partially correlated!

9:02	Guest: Did Vasgersian just use the word “union” to arod??? Beef???

9:02	Tom: While others might think exotic stats such as 10+ K’s in consecutive opening games is what makes baseball interesting, to me, it sounds more like cherrypicking numbers without full understanding of the changes in baseball throughout era.

9:03	Dan Szymborski: gravity-adjusted vertical movement <rubs oil into chest hair>

9:03	Ryan: Seattle is going with the Kraken for the name of its NHL franchise. Is this easily the best sports news of 2020?

9:03	This is lude-i-cris: Its likely the Phillie Phanatic will accidentally set himself on fire at some point

9:03	Guest: A-Rod is an owner calling him a union member is hate speech

9:03	Thanks, Mo Bamba: Dustin May’s leg kick is great to play during your favorite Bronson Arroyo guitar solo

9:04	dave k: Stats are just social constructs humans created to keep track of stuff

9:04	Dan Szymborski: Just try to forgot Bronson Arroyo’s corn rows phase

9:04	Tony Wolfe: poor buster’s just hiding by himself somewhere

9:04	Dodger Fan: Dustin May used to do a squat before each pitch from the stretch

9:04	Dodger Fan: He stopped it during intrasquads, sadly

9:05	Dan Szymborski: “Hey, Dustin, we’d kinda like you to not wear out your knees by the second year of your career.”

9:05	Dodger Fan: Tony, don’t say poor Buster! He texted Mike Trout earlier…

9:05	Dan Szymborski: I have buster’s number but not trout’s. Maybe I should keep texting buster and hope I get included on a Trout group text

9:05	JaAm: I know Mustin Day is not a real day yet

9:05	chumpy: What is your favorite non-swear word/phrase for surprise/exasperation?

9:06	Dan Szymborski: “Crap on a bicycle!”

9:06	Dodger Fan: May Day! May Day!

9:06	YardGoat: Buster is texting Mike Trout for weather updates

9:06	ClippardHOF: Well he is a weatherman

9:07	Dan Szymborski: It’s in a “weather” delay. They can’t call it a rain delay?

9:07	Wire Fan: The drainage in the stands in the park does not seem all that great…

9:07	Hells Bells: The Padres’ manager explicitly said he plan to Not be creative with his management/roster construction this year. Why isn’t it the priority of every club to be mentioned amongst the Rays, A’s, Astros, and Dodgers as the most creative/efficient at maximizing results?

9:08	dave k: truly the PC police have won if we can’t say rain delay

9:08	Tony Wolfe: the sicko libs have “cancelled” rain

9:08	Dan Szymborski: lol

9:09	Dan Szymborski: Someone really shoudl tell A-Rod that Yoenis Cespedes isn’t a superstar

9:09	Dan Szymborski: Nor does Robinson Cano texting you to tell you they have great chemistry isn’t actually evidence of anything.

9:09	Tom: so much terrible takes in such a short time… Cespedes is the superstar Mets need…. Astros are a sleeper…

9:09	Dan Szymborski: I swear he was SO much better when he was doing this occasionally at the end of his career

9:10	Tony Wolfe: astros being a sleeper is an incredible take

9:10	Dan Szymborski: Don’t sleep on that team that won 107 games last year

9:10	dave k: Imagine losing the World Series and being a sleeper the next season

9:10	Dan Szymborski: Razzed by crazy A’s fans? Matt hasn’t seen an A’s game since 1989.

9:11	Dan Szymborski: “Which team is an underdog. Don’t say the Dodgers”

9:12	Tony Wolfe: “who else is good in the nl. please do not be obvious.” “………… the defending NL east champions”

9:12	Dan Szymborski: So the average A-Rod sleeper pick won 102 games last year

9:12	Dan Szymborski: Hey A-Rod, who’s a real sleeper in the AL Cy Young race?

9:12	dave k: Arent the Dodgers the MOST underdog?

9:12	JaAm: Royals could be buyers talk on national TV, nature is healing

9:13

Dan Szymborski:

DSzymborski

@DSzymborski

“Hey A-Rod, how about a deep sleeper for the AL Cy Young?”

“Well, the Yankees picked up this pitcher Gerrit Cole who might be in for a big year. Tyler Wade texted me to let me know that Gary Sanchez has fallen for his bedroom eyes. We’ll know for sure the first 20 pitches.”

24 Jul 2020

9:14	Dan Szymborski: Sorry, tweetin ga littlet too

9:14	Dodger Fan: Calling the Astros an underdog is like saying Javier Báez has good plate discipline

9:14	Dan Szymborski: You know who might surprise and have a big power year? Pete Alonso. You heard it here first.

9:15	Dan Szymborski: I kinda miss Harold Reynolds at this point.

9:15	dave k: Liar

9:15	Dodger Fan: John Smoltz is almost appealing right now

9:16	JaAm: “Buster is safe…he’s standing out in the outfield getting absolutely drenched right now as you can see on camera”

9:17	dave k: Wouldnt Dodger Stadium look the same if fans were allowed there or not? #rimshot

9:17	dave k: I dont want to alarm anyone but we are close to McGarver territory and I’m scared

9:17	Guest: Dodgers only predicted to win 38 games in 2020 = underdog.

9:17	Wire Fan: Percentage of starts by a starter apparently changes with season length? ARod having a rough night.

9:17	dave k: Player starting 12 games instead of 32 is more important.

9:19	dave k: Has any team ever won a World Series after dropping in wins by 65?

9:19	Dan Szymborski: heh

9:19	Dan Szymborski: maybe once we have our 30 team playoffs!

9:19	Quarantino Martinez: They’re going to do a 29 team playoff, just to laugh at the Orioles…

9:20	Dan Szymborski: Or 30 teams. The O’s show up and the commish tells them “Oh, the last spot is for the NPB champs, not you guys.”

9:20	Wire Fan: So they are going to play this to completion this year and not just call the game over since they got 5 innings in?

9:21	Kvn: MLB deserves the O’s making the playoffs

9:21	Guest: Chris Davis WS MVP

9:21	dave k: Kurkjian is making a strong play against ARod for uselessness in commentating

9:22	Tony Wolfe: Richie Martin walk-off to clinch a series

9:22	Dan Szymborski: Uh, is Tim’s audio out of sync or am I having a stroke?

9:22	Dodger Fan: Hunter Harvey getting a game 7 save?

9:22	Dan Szymborski: haha, like he still exists

9:22	P: The sudden death wild card games were my favorite games to watch each year as long as my team wasn’t involved. I’m going to miss that.

9:22	Dan Szymborski: The Orioles accidentally killed Harvey with some groundskeeping equipment and they just put him on the IL every year hoping nobody finds out

9:23	homealone: there’s gonna be an earthquake in the fourth or so inning in LA tonight, isn’t there

9:23	Dodger Fan: For a team that I suspect will have easily made the playoffs and won the division, a three-game series to advance is just grossly unfair.

9:24	Dan Szymborski: I don’t like questions that are specifically posed to try to trip them up

9:24	Dan Szymborski: to players

9:24

Aspergilius fumigatus: With regards to the Soto news, why aren’t there more stringent guidelines regarding distancing between players on the same team? I get that it is very hard to do, but this seems like the best way to mitigate risk. Or else teams are risking a huge outbreak and subsequent disaster when they face an opponent

9:25	Dan Szymborski: I think they’re being a bit lax.

9:25	Brian: Lindor, over or under Betts contract?

9:25	Dan Szymborski: As of right now, it would be over, but a lot can happen in two seasons

9:25	Dodger Fan: Under

9:25	remember when guy: remember when one of the mlb was adamant that the playoffs had to end before november in their negotiations with mlbpa

9:25	Guest: Def under

9:26	Dan Szymborski: I like that he did the kaboom sound

9:26	Dan Szymborski: I’ll do a poll for Lindor! More efficient

9:26	Dan Szymborski: Who Wins This Game? Yankees (41.7% \| 28 votes) Nationals (2.9% \| 2 votes) Us When It’s Over and We Don’t Have to See Angel Hernandez Any More Tonight (55.2% \| 37 votes) Total Votes: 67

9:26	Dan Szymborski: I never started that poll

9:27	Dan Szymborski: What Does Francisco Lindor Get In His Next Contract? <$300 Million (20.2% \| 14 votes) $300 Million to Betts (50.7% \| 35 votes) Above Betts to $400 Million (27.5% \| 19 votes) >$400 Million (1.4% \| 1 vote) Total Votes: 69

9:28	Boof bonser: If mlb just wants endless tacky media events why not make it a 17-team playoff and the extra team is made up entirely of dogs?

9:28	Wire Fan: All time great lineup with the Betts,, Bellinger’s and…. Buehler’s (who must have a sneaky good bat?)

9:28	Dodger Fan: And somehow it’ll be Kershaw’s fault again

9:28	dave k: @homealone it wont be an earthquake. the sprinkler system will go off

9:29	Dodger Fan: A satellite will fall out of the sky and blow up Chavez Ravine

9:29	Wire Fan: Dave Roberts can always just move Kershaw to the bullpen. He seems to like that.

9:29	dave k: Betts will catch it

9:31	Dan Szymborski:

9:31	Dodger Fan: Pabo

9:31	Dan Szymborski: This was some of my best work and damn you people who don’t get it!

9:31	Dodger Fan: Sandoval

9:31	Dodger Fan: is

9:31	Dodger Fan: batting

9:31	Dodger Fan: third

9:31	Guest: Finally, Dan makes a funny image

9:32	dave k: Giants have to rebuild, will be bad. This has never happened to any team ever in the history of baseball

9:32	ben: Next player to exceed Betts’s contract?

9:33	Dan Szymborski: Outside Lindor which you guys mostly don’t agree with, I don’t see anyone on the horizon

9:33	Dodger Fan: Dan if I’m ever on trial for a sandwich-related crime, you’re my lawyer’s first call as a witness

9:33	Dodger Fan: I would say Acuña but…

9:33	Dan Szymborski: And then you look at the Albies deal and feel worse

9:33	Kvn: Does skittles really want to be associated with rain delays?

9:34	Wire Fan: Bellinger? Still about 5 years out…

9:34	JaAm: Delay the rainbow

9:34	Dan Szymborski: I really want to murder the lady in that Geico commercial

9:34	Quarantino Martinez: Too bad they cut off when they did. Could’ve done a whole “Tyler Wade in the Water” bit…

9:34	YardGoat: Juan Soto will get a big deal

9:34	Dan Szymborski: He’s awhile away though

9:35	Dan Szymborski: 5 yrs to FA and won’t get more than Betts with cost-controlled years in there

9:35	Dodger Fan: Maybe it’ll be the rockies giving Corey Kluber $500 million to start in left field

9:35	dave k: if he does it again Pete Alsono

9:36	Tony Wolfe: I might be more curious about how many of the current stars even get as close to free agency as Mookie did, with how popular extensions have gotten

9:36	Dan Szymborski: I’m a little concernerd about this commercial for “authentic” medication

9:36	Dodger Fan: Wander Franco?

9:36	JaAm: Gleyber? Probably a stretch but there is nothing obvious

9:36	Tom: Alonso is going to be closer to Goldschmidt than Betts due to his age.

9:36	Tony Wolfe: Obviously Lindor will, but

9:36	Guest: Judge is too old I suppose

9:36	Guest: Judge?

9:37	casual observer: alonso is simultaneously 25 years old and 40 years old

9:37	JaAm: It’ll just be Trout probably

9:37	Dan Szymborski: Jeff Francoeur would have swung at that Fauci pitch.

9:37	Dakota mckee: Why didnt more teams put a pinch runner type on their expanded roster? Or did they do that and I just wasnt paying attention?

9:37	Dan Szymborski: A lot do have a guy like that around

9:37	Matt: that was awful I apologize

9:37	Matt: Smashing Claytons-“Zero (Rings)”

9:38	Dodger Fan: Terrance Gore is on the LAD roster

9:38	Dan Szymborski: Billy hamilton, though not brought on FOR that purpose

9:38	Guest: Andrew Stevenson is the Nats’ PR guy?

9:38	Dan Szymborski: Tyler Wade since I’ve been told he runs like a wide receiver

9:39	dave k: I’ve been wondering about this all day… what if someone hits 400 this year? are we gonna act like it counts? will they asterisk it in the record boooks?

9:39	Dan Szymborski: There won’t be an official asterisk, but there’ll always be one in our hearts

9:39	JaAm: Cliff Lee is still on the market for teams looking for a pinch runner

9:39	Dan Szymborski: BARTOLO PINCH RUNNER

9:39	Dodger Fan: I will personally be asterisking records, but probably not the WS champion

9:40	Tom: I wonder how much will a 39 year old Mike Trout fetch in 2031? (assuming MLB still exists)

9:40	Dan Szymborski: I mean, is being humble really what makes someone into a baseball player? Is that what you really think?

9:40	Dodger Fan: Everyone played with the same circumstances

9:40	dave k: well MLB will be making 25 billion a year so his 515m contract isnt as impressive

9:40	Smiling Politely: Dan I just logged into the chat and I’ve been reading through…that Mellon Collie and the Infinite Curveball image is amazing and heartbreaking, just like William Corgan, Jr.

9:41	Dan Szymborski: See, SOMEONE is amused by me and I swear that’s not a burner question.

9:41	Guest: Was just thinking about how Chris Sale called Adam laroche’s son a leader in their clubhouse

9:41	dave k: The championship ring is still gonna shine the same as a 162 season winner

9:41	Guest: the WS chmpion is always asterisked given the nature of playoffs. Why not just have no divisions, everyone plays everyone else six times (three home, three away)?

9:41	JaAm: New 2020 rule: courtesy runners for catchers

9:42	Dodger Fan: But the trophy is just a piece of metal, guys!

9:42	dave k: Adam LaRoches son is the next 500m player

9:42	Dan Szymborski: that’s MR DRAKE LaRoche to you, peasant

9:42	dave k: ESPN doesnt know who else to put as the face of the giants. They just alked about Longoria not playing

9:42	pittsburgh resident: now laroche appears in the chat, it never ends

9:43	JaAm: ARod signs himself to his 3rd record contract as owner of the Mets

9:43	Tony Wolfe: I’m really damn excited to see Johnny Cueto make an OD start again

9:43	dave k: so will they play this game at 2 am?

9:43	Dan Szymborski: Bud Selig is still paid $6 million a year

9:43	Andrew G.: Tony, big fan. I’ve got a two parter for ya. Firstly, what does it say about Joey Votto that he has zero playoff series wins in his career? Secondly, who are your darkhorse Cy Young candidates? Thanks, T-Man.

9:44	Tony Wolfe: come on man

9:44	Tony Wolfe: clevinger and castillo are getting Cys though

9:44	Dodger Fan: I recently graduated from the Alex Rodriguez School of Baseball Analysis, and Jacob deGrom is my dark horse Cy Young pick.

9:44	Andrew G.: i’m serious about the second one

9:45	Wire Fan: I think the runner at 2nd in the 10th inning rule should be modified to allow the opposing team to pick the runner

9:45	Dodger Fan: Clevinger doesn’t deserve to be a dark horse. He’s so freaking underrated.

9:46	Tony Wolfe: yeah those two are only really dark horses in that they aren’t Cole/deGrom

9:46	Guest: Have either of you been in MLB clubhouses? Is there any way it’s an appropriate environment for a kid, or is my vision of clubhouses just colored by the worst parts of ball four, etc

9:46	Dan Szymborski: I have been. It’s not super exciting sinc ea bunch of writers are around

9:47	Dan Szymborski: I’m not in there very often though. Beat writers are working to get their quotes and the like and if I need someone, I can get in touch with someone

9:47	Aspergilius fumigatus: Has anyone else seen A-Rod’s tweet of him playing Connect-4, but just completely incorrectly? It’s sooo ~not~ how you play Connect-4 that I had a visceral reaction to the photo

9:47	Dan Szymborski: Wait, I have no tseen that

9:47	dave k: by TEXTING?

9:47	Dan Szymborski: I very rarely talk to players about actual baseball. I’d make a terrible reporter lol

9:48	Dan Szymborski: I probably spend half the time arguing with their agents

9:48

Aspergilius fumigatus: A-Rod connect-4 tweet:

Alex Rodriguez

@AROD

For a guy who swung and missed as often as I did, connecting on four in a row can be a challenge sometimes. 🤣🤣

Still, games like this help keep our minds sharp and focused and can be great fun for the whole family.

What’s your go-to game? Text it to me at (305) 690-0485

30 Apr 2020

9:48	dave k: ARod sets the pieces on fire?

9:48	Dodger Fan: Please send this tweet as I am too lazy to open a new tab and google it.

9:49	Dan Szymborski: I don’t understand what’s going on in this picture!

9:49	dave k: WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS PICTURE

9:49	Aspergilius fumigatus: Also, like, is he doing ads for Connect-4? So confused

9:50	Tony Wolfe: that picture is completely insane

9:50	Dan Szymborski: Tony, it’s insane on like five or six different levels

9:50	dave k: This is like someone took pictures at 2 different times and super imposed the board

9:50	dave k: this picture alone is enough to NOT let him own a baseball team

9:50	Brian: also Connect 4 is a solved game, if you have the first move you cannot lose!

9:50	Dan Szymborski: A-Rod solved it. You always win if you play by yourself\

9:50	JaAm: How could you possibly take a picture of connect 4 that is less like how you actually play

9:51	Dan Szymborski: I’d love to see a whole series of professionally shot photographs of A-Rod misplaying board games.

9:51	Dan Szymborski: They show him playing Monopoly and he has 20 hotels on one property and he’s accumulated three tokens.

9:51	dave k: Arod wearing the Sorry board as a hat

9:51	Tony Wolfe: bug-eyed in a dark room playing mouse trap

9:52	Guest: Looks like a stock photo

9:52	Dan Szymborski: A-Rod playing backgammon with the doubling cube and moving 64 spaces

9:52	Ben Clemens: Hey what’s up guys

9:52	Dan Szymborski: Hey Ben!

9:52	Tony Wolfe: ben!

9:52	Eric A Longenhagen: Howdy howdy

9:52	Ben Clemens: Gonna be chatting the late game, and got here a little early

9:52	Ben Clemens: By here, I mean my couch

9:52	Brian: Chess with a knight on any 4 or 5 square in the first move

9:52	Dodger Fan: BEN

9:52	Brian: HI BEN

9:52	Guest: Bennnnnnn!

9:52	Dan Szymborski: Scroll up. Did you ever see the image of A-Rod playing COnnect Four?

9:52	Guest: You don’t want to know Ben

9:52	Ben Clemens: Oh yeah I’ve seen it

9:52	Ben Clemens: It’s truly excellent

9:53	Guest: Ben is your mom joining?

9:53	JaAm: ARod wanted a game that would be a good message for connecting with family and so he chose Connect 4 based on it saying “Connect” on the box

9:53	Ben Clemens: Maybe! She’s a Nats fan

9:53	Dakota mckee: You think he’s playing connect 4 but arod is actually playing 4d chess

9:53	Guest: Battleship with all the pegs in the holes with no ships

9:53	Ben Clemens: And was 100% watching earlier

9:53	dave k: Arod rolling dice playing monopoly

9:53	Tony Wolfe: dying at the battleship one

9:53	Ben Clemens: I sent her a pitching ninja gif of the Fauci first pitch

9:53	Dan Szymborski: This is the least threatening lineup to have this music.

9:53	Ben Clemens: Boy was that bad

9:53	Ben Clemens: Clubbed to Extremely Slight Injury

9:54	Dan Szymborski: Jepsen’s was still worse

9:54	dave k: thats suppose to be candyland… i’m a moron

9:54	i stan ben: oh heck yeah, what’s up ben

9:54	Dan Szymborski: The people are just too big which makes it really creepy.

9:54	Ben Clemens: Bold user name choice

9:55	Dan Szymborski: See, I just get disappointed sighs when people see it’s just me.

9:55	Tony Wolfe: let. johnny. ride. to. the. mound. on. his. horse.

9:55	Ben Clemens: It’s a pretty weird choice to use Hip Hop is Dead but leave out the chorus, which is probably my favorite part

9:55	i stan ben: i’ll be honest it hasn’t paid off until just now

9:55	Guest: “I always battled in the box, so sometimes now I like to play a round of battleship with my family to keep us in good health”

9:55	Ben Clemens: “Baseball reference!”

9:55	Dan Szymborski: These people cardboard cutouts are weirdly scaled

9:55	Dan Szymborski: There’s like this GIANT toddler lurking behind Bellinger

9:56	Tony Wolfe: where are the dog cutouts

9:56	Tony Wolfe: I was told there’d be dog cutouts

9:56	Ben Clemens: Tony my wife is trying to get the Giants to let us buy a dog cutout

9:56	Tony Wolfe: YES

9:56	Ben Clemens: And they’ve been conspicuously silent

9:56	Ben Clemens: It’s aggravating

9:56	Tony Wolfe: ah man

9:57	Guest: How much does it cost Ben?

9:57	Ben Clemens: Honestly I don’t remember. We never got that far. The Dodgers one is like, what, 100 bucks?

9:58	Brian: BLACK LIVES MATTER!!!

9:58	Derek: Baseball needs more Morgan Freeman

9:58	Guest: Are there fresh cutouts every game or are they season-ticket holder cutouts?

9:58	JaAm: The Giants are also 100 bucks

9:59	Ben Clemens: I’ll be honest, it’s a stupid purchase, but I’m a sucker when it comes to Ruby, and also they let you pick it up, authenticate it, and take it home as game-used after the season

9:59	ben: Does the $100 go to charity? If not it’s a little weird.

9:59	Ben Clemens: Ha! We’ve got jokes tonight.

9:59	Dan Szymborski: Wait, did he say six continents? Who’s the Australian I’m forgetting?

9:59	Ben Clemens: Definitely not

9:59	Brian: only 6 continents… they left out Antarctica… Is that because its only white!!! I smell conspiracy!

9:59	YardGoat: Everyone said hi to Ben, but did anyone say hello to Eric?