Eno Sarris: be here shortly. If you’ve seen the ads on MLBN, you’ve heard this song, but it’s great, and the video even better:

Eno Sarris:

Jack Black: Please rank for 2016: Eovaldi, R. Hill, Berrios, Snell

Eno Sarris: You got it, but I could see moving Berrios ahead of Hill. Hill only has two pitches…

enos brain:

Tom: Would you be so kind as to name three prospects you would love to roster at this weekend’s AL-LABR?

Dave Cameron: Happy Wednesday, everyone.

Dave Cameron: Let’s get this party started.

Mike D: What’re the chances Soler is traded by the deadline for pitching this year?

Dave Cameron: Would guess that either he or Schwarber don’t finish the year in Chicago. The one who doesn’t hit will probably be trade bait.

Mike D: How do some non-speed guys always beat BABIP averages?

Dave Cameron: They hit the ball hard and on a line. Guys like Miguel Cabrera square up a lot of pitches, and hard-hit balls are caught less often than balls that are hit up or down. Guys who can avoid infield flies also don’t give away free in-play outs.

Paul Swydan: Whoops, lost track of time. OK, let’s start.

Trainman: Chapman suspension: fair or foul? Do you see him being the closer if Miller or Betances dominate out the gate?

Paul Swydan: So, on the one hand, I didn’t like the idea of giving him a suspension long enough to give the Yankees an extra year of his services. But I also think these domestic abuse offenders should be treated more harshly than PED offenders. And I think that there is, since no charges were filed in this case, and the woman was apparently *physically* unharmed, it leaves the door open for stiffer punishments when those things are in play. But we’ll have to see.

Jeff Zimmerman: Fair, wasn’t guilty in court. Miller will be closer

Ruby: Hypothetical: The best player on every team tears an Achilles on April 1. What happens to playoff odds?

Paul Swydan: Probably not a ton, because every team is losing that one player. Maybe the Angels and Nationals and Dodgers are affected a little more than most.

august fagerstrom: return of the Tuesday chat!

august fagerstrom: baseball on the TV!

august fagerstrom: good day

august fagerstrom: Listen to some Grinderman

august fagerstrom: we’ll start up ’round noonish

august fagerstrom: alrighty!

Dan Szymborski: We get signal.

Dan Szymborski: Main screen turn on.

Rick: ZiPS projection for wRC+ is on the individual player pages, but not on the mass spreadsheet or compiled projections page. Is there any way to fix this?

Dan Szymborski: No, because I don’t calculate wRC+

Outta my way, Gyorkass: I saw on the Brewers ZiPS page that O. Arcia is projected to be a +2 WAR player. Is that all in the defense? He’s hit well, but nothing above AA ball.

Dan Szymborski: A 20-year-old hitting like that in AA isn’t something to poo-poo.

Jeff Sullivan: Hello friends

Jeff Sullivan: Welcome to late baseball chat

Jeff Sullivan: Last night I genuinely had a dream that I was late to this chat. I knew it was a dream instead of reality because I felt anxious about it

Guest: Daaammmnn Jeffrey! Back at it again with the friday chat!

Jeff Sullivan: Can’t stop me

Jeff Sullivan: Nice try haters

Eno or Paul? Paul or Eno?: Hi Eno…or Paul,

Eno Sarris: It’s Paul!!!

Eno Sarris: If you watch Broad City, you’ll recognize this fire af jam from last week’s premier. It’s great:

Eno Sarris: Let’s talk some baseball!

Ryan: Dynasty league — Michael Brantley or Justin Upton?

Eno Sarris: Going Upton here. Not only does Brantley have the shoulder this year, but the back from previous year makes him a little sketchy long-term, too.

Dave Cameron: It’s Wednesday, so let’s chat. I was only expecting to chat for 60 minutes or so, but Jose Bautista thinks 150 is more reasonable.

Dave Cameron: So we’ll see how long we go!

mtsw: [Orioles physical joke]

Dave Cameron: I wonder exactly what they think this all accomplishes? What’s the point of being known as the organization who will back out of deals?

Eddy: Should the Rangers opt to start Gallo in LF to open the season? Feel like they have viable in house options instead of signing a FA.

Dave Cameron: It seems like he should at least get a look, given that he’s blocked by Beltre at third. But if they are serious about contending, they can’t have their plan be Gallo with no backup.

Paul Swydan: OK let’s do this!

Paul Swydan: I am somewhat dismayed that you are all so rational about the Reyes thing. Is this not the Hot Take Zone?

Paul Swydan: (Kidding. It isn’t.)

Ceej : Both $1 players. Pollock or Schwarber as a final keeper? Due in a week.

Paul Swydan: I like both, but I have to lean Pollock. He has more well defined performance at the big league level, and a more clearly defined role moving forward. And he’s only 28.

Jeff Zimmerman: Pollock, I think. Tough call. It may come down to the makeup of the rest of your team.

Dan Szymborski: Hey guys! Sorry I’m late, Time-Warner was doing some work on the block and I was internetless for a few hours.

Dan Szymborski: Uh oh, it appears to be just me.

Testing: How many wins will the Twins have?

Dan Szymborski: I have him in mid 70s, but they could be higher.

hscer: What is “System and Compressed Memory” and why is it such a jerk to my RAM and disk drive?

Dan Szymborski: Can you send me the whole image of yoru RAM usage on Twitter or something?